Learn how to dance with mymodernguru.com
Written on Tuesday, May 16th, 2006 by Rui De Sousa :: 0 comments to this post
Do yer, do yer, do yer, do yer wanna dance? Well if you do or you have to and you don’t even know a few basic steps or moves DON’T PANIC.
Although you’re there, on the floor, about to be revealed as an abysmal social failure - plus completely blowing your chance of any supplementary adventures later in the evening - there’s still a way out.
O.K., the first thing is to say you’ve just had an urgent call that you have to return RIGHT NOW. Saying this could earn you sympathy - if it seems you may be facing a tragedy - or prestige - if it’s assumed you’re closing some major deal in New York [body language can be a big help here].
Once you’ve made your excuse, find somewhere very private then whip out your ipod, palm pilot, mobile phone or whatever and go straight to MyModernGuru.Com.
As well as providing you with a step by step video guide to enough of the basics to get you out of trouble in any sort of dance you’re likely to encounter, you can scroll to ‘ice breakers’ and pick up a few pick up lines that might turn the whole evening from a potential disaster into a potential bonanza.
Alternatively, you might want to casually refer to some revealing incident from your last visit to Outer Mongolia; in which case selecting ‘Travel Guru’ will do the trick. It might also be a good idea to look at ‘yokes’ [that’s Swedish for jokes] and select something suitable from a range that runs from ‘any occasion’ to ‘adults only’.
Equipped with this full deck of cards [another subject on which the Guru can provide some handy advice] you can return to the dance floor, nonchalantly brush aside any questions about that urgent call - after all you get them all the time - and see what delights the evening might hold.
And If romance is in the air, you might feel inspired to provide another arrow for cupid’s quiver in the form of a suitable gift. Haven’t got a clue what to buy? Well don’t waste time with soul searching and self loathing, just turn to your Guru - or should I say MyModernGuru.com and scroll to ‘gift horse’ for the solution; after all ‘Just wishing and hoping and thinking and praying, planning and dreaming…’
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